reality

it is still raining-since yesterday annnnnd i am so glad for it since i have been laying in bed and running to the bathroom on and off. can't imagine what being sick like this would be like in the straight heat here! yikes! it almost feels like i got sick so that i would be taken out like this on purpose... getting focused wouldn't be such a bad idea.

i need somebody to bounce ideas off of... or at least the order of things. I'm not gonna pussy foot around anymore because the longer i take to step into what i know I'm meant to do the longer I'm going to be miserable. while being away i have yet again realized that my environment is detrimental to how much work i get done. by work i mean personal work, schooling-science and spiritual, research cha cha cha!

i wonder if there are any kinds of grants i could apply for so that i could spend my time on this stuff and  not at a job that takes up valuable time...