going going going and soon to be gonzo...

passport pictures, passport screw ups, ticket problems, packing up and moving out, working as much as i possibly can... starting monday.

i will be gone again. gone again, gone and gone and gone again.

hanging out in a gas town coffee shop and writing this.........................

none of this phases me anymore.

how about i just accept the fact that i am meant to be a nomad 4 life?

i saw this today....

“Don’t let your luggage define your travels, each life unravels differently.”

{ Shane Koyczan }

see... i feel like i could take this two ways... stay where i am and don't run away, that it's okay to be exactly where i am, no matter how bored, uninspired and unfulfilled i may be or feel. change can happen where you are, i don't have to let my baggage determine the rest of my life etc etc.

ooorrr...

i can take advantage of the opportunity being handed to me.
-it's a test >>>
-a promise
-a time to to ween myself off of everything that is holding me back....

i can release all baggage that has currently been defining my life and let it all go, therefore allowing my life to unravel differently than it has been.

SCHOOL

it doesn't seem to matter how hard i try to do the mainstream way of things it never works out for me...

and trust me.... it's not like i haven't tried.

ENERGY

me in a classroom is like a slow death. suppressing my energy is the worst thing i have ever done for my wellbeing and progression in life.

THE PROBLEM IN THE CLASSROOM IS THE ENERGY FROM OTHER PEOPLE.

its obvious to me now.

i am highly sensitive to energies therefore if I'm thrown into a classroom with 30 other people (a confined space)... it sends me through the roof because i am on feeling OVERLOAD. if i was not aware of what is appropriate and what is not then i would have been bouncing off the walls with my hand in the air all the time and my mouth running a mile a minute. it takes a lot of work to not be annoying.... i don't think people understand how PAINFUL it was to try and sit still. its all or nothing in there. its all or nothing at school. its exhausting all around.



ALTHOUGH I HAVE LEARNED A LOT THE LAST COUPLE YEARS....

I CANNOT WAIT TO GET AWAY FROM HERE.